Positivity For The Win

Hello beautiful people!

Today's blog is all about POSITIVITY and how the more effort we make to put it into the world, the better our lives will be. I have so much to say on the subject, but I can't write it all, so I'm gonna scatter some nice quotes throughout that I think sum up some of my feelings :)

The challenge is going well. It’s a difficult one to track because of the fact that it’s about internal change rather than external, but I really feel like day by day it’s getting easier. For me it’s all about drawing lines between just getting things off your chest, and moaning. Sometimes things can get too much and you need to talk it through with someone. But it’s all about making sure that the negativity from that situation doesn’t seep into other areas of your life.

In my second show week I worked really hard to avoid negative conversations, and what I actually found really helpful was to actively be more positive. I was trying to do things like compliment people more, and ask more questions about them rather than talk about myself. I was putting more of my focus on other people and listening more. I was making more effort to engage people in conversation. Basically, I was simply making more effort to be nice. Each day I was going in with the aim to make the people around me happy.

And I think it worked. It was a really great week, and despite the stress of doing a massive musical, everyone seemed to have a good time. Now I don’t take full responsibility for that, but I like to think that I brought a bit of positive energy into the mix.

Then I started thinking. I was thinking back to first year of uni, when we didn’t know each other. I remember how much effort I made to get to know people. It was the same kind of thing, paying extra attention to what people were saying and really engaging with them. I remember it in other people too. We were all really nice and polite and kind in the beginning. After a while, these things tend to give way a little. It’s natural, I think. When you get comfortable with people you then start showing your darker sides a bit. And it’s great when you have friends who will put up with your bad sides because they love your good ones. But it’s occurred to me lately that maybe it would be better if we carried on making that kind of effort with people.

Because really, why would we ever stop being nice, polite and kind to each other? What does that achieve? When you stop and take just a little bit of time to make effort with someone, whether that’s through complimenting them, or making effort to include them, or just making sure you really listen to what they have to say, it has the potential to really brighten their day. And that in turn can brighten yours.

I’ve started to realise that even if you’ve known someone for a while, you probably only see the tip of the iceberg. People are a complex and exciting amalgamation of thousands of moments that can be explored: All you have to do is ask questions. And really listen. I randomly asked a friend who I don’t hang out with much what their family Christmas traditions were, and we launched into a massive conversation about it. I’ve known this person for a few years now, but because I made the effort to ask about them, I got to know them a little bit more that day.

It can be easy to get wrapped up in yourself and lose interest in others. It can be easy to write someone off because of a personality clash, or a difference in opinion. It can be easy to say ‘hey, we’re not that close’ and just stop making the effort. But I’m realising now that if you do that, you really miss out on a beautiful part of the human experience. The more you get to know people, the more chance you have of understanding them. And the more you understand people, the more forgiving you can be. And things just feel a lot better that way.

So this challenge is sort of morphing as it goes along. As well as trying to cut down on all those negative habits, I’m now trying to boost all my positive ones, and make a lot more effort to spread positivity and happiness to those in my life. Seems an appropriate challenge for December.

Thirteen days left (and only eight till Christmas!!!!)

Peace and Love